Summary: If you want a good sex life, and you are in a long-term relationship with children, you need to make having sex at least as high a priority as brushing your teeth.
So Joe bumps into Bob at the gym.
“How’s it going Bob?
“Not so good Joe. I almost got fired from my job yesterday.”
“They said I haven’t been coming to work over the last two weeks.”
“What? You mean you just don’t show up?”
“Well I’d like to but I don’t think you should force these things. Working should come naturally. It should be spontaneous or it ruins its specialness. Lately it just hasn’t been happening.”
“You’re shitting me right? Like you don’t even set an alarm clock?”
“No, of course not. I don’t want to force it. If I’m supposed to go to work it will just happen. It will feel right.”
“Ok, I’m not going to argue with you on that one because you are either whacked in the head or you’re fucking with me. Either way, I’m done. But what’s up with your teeth? They’ll all yellow and crusty and your breath stinks like a sewer!”
“Well I haven’t brushed in like a month or so…”
“Huh? Are you crazy. Your teeth are going to rot out!”
“Well I’d like to have clean teeth but I just haven’t been in the mood. It’s not natural to force yourself to brush your teeth. It’s not like I don’t try. I’ll get out the toothbrush and even put it on the counter. Sometime I’ll even put some toothpaste on it. But then something else just comes up, the kids distract me, or I get too tired and just go to bed instead.”
“Look, if you want to have healthy teeth you need to brush them. That’s it. You can’t wait around for it to happen. You need to make a schedule.”
“I just don’t believe that. My body will tell me when the time is right. God didn’t put me on earth to act like some robot that just brushes their teeth on command or forces themselves to go to work. These things are intimate and special. If it was meant to be, it will be.”
“Dude. I’m outta here.” Continue reading